Christian Homekeeping™: Tuesday Funnies

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Tuesday Funnies

1 comments:

Candy ♥ said...: LOVE it!!!!!!!!!
thx for the good laughs!!!! :); 11:50 PM

Our Beliefs in a Nutshell

The Basics

- Trinitarian - God the Father, God the Son & God the Holy Spirit

- Salvation is through faith in Jesus Christ, not works

- Holy Spirit baptism is subsequent to the new birth and evidenced by speaking in tongues as the Spirit gives utterance

- Water baptism is to show an outward reflection of an inward work

- We must live holy lives and continue in the faith

- Our good works show others our walk with God (fruit tells you what kind of tree), not that works make us saved

The Family Unit

- Women's role is to be a keeper at home

- Husband is the leader or head of the home

- Marriage is for 2 to become one in a perfect union and for procreation to raise up children in the Lord (they are HIS reward)

- Keep our children unspotted from the world by training them up in the way they should go - we homeschool to instill these Godly values

- Abortion or devices that mimic it are murder in the sight of the Lord

Finances

- A tenth of ALL our increase goes to God; which has ordained the church to handle as it sees fit for the furtherance of the gospel

- We must be good stewards of all that God gives us - from money to taking care of this earth through recycling, living frugal and not wasting

- Not having a love of money or mindset to get rich but rather being thankful for what we have; contentment

- Trusting in God to supply ALL our needs, he will never fail, no matter the circumstance!

Modesty & Appearance

- CLEAR distinction of the sexes and attire of each: dresses for women and pants for men

- Long Hair is a woman's glory and her covering and sign of submission to her head and for the angels

- Attire must be modest: loose fitting, not revealing or showing of the thighs, etc.

- Showing shamefacedness and being chaste with an unpainted face or other adornments

- Not having masculine behavior as a woman but feminine and men are not to be effiminate but rather masculine - again CLEAR distinction of the sexes which God intended

Worldliness

- Not involving oneself in the entertainments of this world that have the appearance of evil; keep oneself unspotted from this world and its enticements

- Definitely not a part of worldly establishments such as bars, clubs and such like that are dens of sin and all manner of evil

- Loving the world and its fashions and mentality is strictly forbidden in the Bible - we must be separate and "come out from among them"

There is more but this would get pretty long if I included them all - so basically we believe the FULL gospel!

Quotes to Ponder

The objective in Christian homeschooling is not to teach children how to "deal with the real world." I do not want to teach my children how to merely survive this life. As believers in Christ, we are called to be overcomers! - HE magazine

The modest virgin, the prudent wife, and the careful matron, are much more serviceable in life than petticoated philosophers, blustering heroines, or virago queens. She who makes her husband and her children happy, who reclaims the one from vice and trains up the other to virtue, is a much greater character than ladies described in romances, whose whole occupation is to murder mankind with shafts from their quiver, or their eyes. - Oliver Goldsmith

Long ago I ceased to count heads. Truth is usually in the minority in this evil world. - Charles Spurgeon

In a time of universal deceit, telling the TRUTH, is a revolutionary act . -George Orwell

You have enemies? Good. That means you've stood up for something, sometime in your life. -Winston Churchill

It is not the critic who counts: not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes up short again and again, because there is no effort without error or shortcoming, but who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, who spends himself for a worthy cause; who, at the best, knows, in the end, the triumph of high achievement, and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who knew neither victory nor defeat. ~ Theodore Roosevelt

Christian mothers too often neglect their home-centered role for the empty promises of fulfillment in the workplace, while they warehouse their children in daycare centers. Parents send their children to secular schools where God is outlawed, and they allow them to watch trashy movies and listen to vile music—and hang out with those who do the same. After years of training in the ways of rebellion through godless schooling, debauched entertainment, and peer association, Christian parents are somehow surprised when their teenagers rebel, forsaking the God of their fathers.- Philip Lancaster

You are as much serving God in looking after your own children, and training them up in God's fear, and minding the house, and making your household a church for God, as you would be if you had been called to lead an army to battle for the Lord of hosts. - Charles Spurgeon

“Why do women want to dress like men when they’re fortunate enough to be women? Why lose femininty, which is one of our greatest charms? We get more accomplished by being charming than we would be flaunting around in pants and smoking. I’m very fond of men. I think they are wonderful creatures. I love them dearly. But I don’t want to look like one. When women gave up their long skirts, they made a grave error….”-Tasha Tudor

SECULARISM is a philosophy that claims that there is no God-or that if there is a God, He is irrelevant. HUMANISM essentially says that in the absence of God, humans can and should act as gods by judging, choosing, and defining what is right for themselves. The philosophy pervading the public education system combines these two philosophies into one.-Ken Ham

The true defining situation for a person is what they do when they are alone and don't have to do anything else. What do they do? Do they do frivolous things? That's when you define what you are. -Kevin Rollins, former CEO of DELL

“How can there be too many children? That’s like saying there are too many flowers.” -Mother Teresa

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Tuesday Funnies

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