Thursday, September 8, 2011

I Know "Her".........

Years ago when I first became a Christian and got married, I had anticipated having children.  Upon voicing this, I was told that I would go to hell if I had a child because my husband was called to preach and a child would hinder his ministry.  (He was told he was called at that time but God is the only one who has the power to call and he will tell us if we are!)  This was tragic for me as I had always desired children, but upon hearing it from someone I trusted, I submitted and tried to quell the desire inside me for three years.  It was many nights of crying and forcing myself into submission because this must be what God wants I thought.  Then, we started learning that a lot of things we were taught by that individual were not correct.  Up came the hope that maybe I could have a child without risking my eternal future or "hindering" things.

So, I asked the question and was covered in sympathy as the pastor told me that I would NOT go to hell for having a child and it had nothing to do with hindering my husband or the ministry.  However, I couldn't even trust his answer, I didn't trust anyone anymore.  One night while sitting on my couch, I asked God to just show me someway or somehow that it was ok and that I could let go of the fear of "putting a child before God."  It was then that I felt the Holy Spirit and as I remember it, started crying and this verse jumped out at me on the page:

For I know him, that he will command his children and his household after him, and they shall keep the way of the LORD, to do justice and judgment; that the LORD may bring upon Abraham that which he hath spoken of him. ~Genesis 18:19

I knew beyond any doubts that God was giving me His blessing to conceive.  God KNEW me!  God knew that I would raise children up in His ways and to do His will!  It was so moving for me and something I haven't forgotten.  No man or woman could ever tell you different, once you've had an experience like that!

After receiving that from the Lord, we made an appointment with my OB-GYN doctor to find out what we needed to do to prepare for pregnancy.  What happened next shook my world up again.  I was told that I may actually be sterile and even if I could conceive, it would probably take about two years.  I was devastated and hurt.  I called out to God, questioning all this as He had just given us His blessing for children and I couldn't understand this.  We tried anyway but I didn't believe I would get pregnant.

Rev. Olson, the head of our church organization, came to preach a revival at our church weeks later.  He was preaching a message so strong about how God was saying "TRUST ME!"  He said it over and over and God reached down and squeezed my heart so strong.  As he preached, I felt that I was pregnant, the baby was inside me at that moment and as the preacher echoed the words, "TRUST ME," I decided to trust God that I was.  After that, I shared with his wife about how I was believing I was pregnant, even though the doctors told me it was most likely not probable.  She seemed sincerely happy for me as she saw my bright eyes of desire for a child.

I was pregnant!  I had actually been 5 weeks pregnant already and we had conceived the first time we tried, despite the doctor's dismal outlook.  During that message from God of "TRUST ME," I was pregnant!  Katie was in my belly all that time and all I had to do was trust completely in God and not man, not a doctor, not anyone but God.

God had given me a blessing!  That is why I'm so adamant in my standing up for women desiring children and those that may try and stop God's blessings.  I'm here to tell you today that God wants to bless you!  Give it to God and TRUST HIM!

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10 comments:

Linda said...

A few other thoughts to ponder on: In the New Testament Timothy tells us, as he mentions the pastoral duties, in I Tim 5:14 for women to marry, BEAR children, guide the house, give none occasion to the adversary to speak reproachfully...
He didn't tell them it would hinder the ministry. Jesus said to let the children come unto Him. That they cost, interfere with man made programs and schedules has nothing to do with the fact that God considers them a blessing and not a burden. If taught by mommy and daddy about the love of God and nourished in the admonition of the Lord perhaps they will accomplish more than meets the eye. More than any program could ever. If a person doesn't agree, maybe they should look at the child Joseph, Samuel, Jeremiah, Moses, Suzanna, Charles and John Wesley..Corrie Ten Boom, D.L. Moody, Jonathan Edwards...etc.(Most were not first born) Not all do, but some have sparked the world, all because a mother and father said yes to God's desires and not only their own.
Truly the world would be a different place without them. They were meant to be.

Sorry so lengthy. But I just thought I'd put my 2 cents in.

Sincerely,
Linda

Christian Homekeeper said...

That was great! Thanks for sharing Linda! :)

Bev

Katy V said...

This is kinda funny because I had this conversation with a professor when I was in college (small Bible college) and he mentioned this verse.

1 Timothy 2:9-15
"In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array; 10But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works. 11Let the woman learn in silence with all subjection. 12But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence. 13For Adam was first formed, then Eve. 14And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression. 15Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing , if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety."

I am really surprised that anyone in a church to say NOT to have children. Like it just doesn't compute to me.

Katy

Christian Homekeeper said...

I agree Katy, the Bible is in full support of women bearing children! It is when man throws his opinion in there and harms others with it that he crosses the line.

Bev

Jackie said...

Our church doesn't teach to NOT have children. Anyone who thinks so should go straight to our leaders and ask them to clarify what you've heard, or what's been said. Go straight to the leader(s) and hear the rest of the story is what I recommend. Thanks, and been praying for you, sis~
Jackie

Christian Homekeeper said...

I'm confused at your comment and my husband read it to and thinks maybe you didn't understand or read the rest of my post? You will notice in the 2nd paragraph that our pastor did tell us that it was ok to have children. He also told us that man before him was wrong in telling me I would go to hell, etc. So obviously, I know our church doesn't teach that, sorry if you were confused, hope that clarified things.

Bev

Aimee2728 said...

I believe sister is just reiterating what you said making sure people remember to find out for themselves.  There are many accusations out and about that are so untrue.  What is most pitiful is that innocent souls have been hurt.  They were so confused and are slowly healing or have turned cold.  So glad to hear you guys got the truth.  I continue to pray for certain (very special to me) people that have experienced such lies and other misconstrued information.

With all that we have been through,     It is such a blessing to know that we are in God's hands. Every day I am more and more amazed at how near he is to our very heart's anxieties and desires.

This is such a beautiful testimony, Bev!

Christian Homekeeper said...

Thanks Aimee! Yes there are false stories, but there are many that did teach wrong things and that has even been shared over the pulpit about the wacky-jack doctrines (vasectomy teaching, etc.) these men spread around. It did happen but they didn't get it from the leaders, they made up their own doctrines sadly. Some under those men suffered but thank God that we can go to God and get our answers! :)

Bev

Jackie said...

Sorry I was referring to someone else who commented and said they were surprised anyone in a church would say to not have children. She seemed to think that was something coming from our church. Sorry for the confusion.

Christian Homekeeper said...

Jackie - ok, I get it now lol! That makes much more sense, sorry about that. I think you were referring to Katy's comment. I did re-read her comment, and she seems to be referring to the man that told me that. The man that told me that was of our church but is no longer of course, he was teaching things on hiw OWN, not the things our church teaches. So, he was wrong and still carrying the banner of our church - that goes back to those "wacky-jack doctrines" that some are passing around that didn't come from the leadership.

Thanks for clarifying that! I was hoping the way I had written things didn't confuse others too but now I understand what you were referring to.

Bev

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