Tuesday, May 24, 2016

Sneak Peek of our New Home

Things are moving good with the new house and we hope to close and move in towards the end of June if all goes well.  I thought I would give a few pics to give you a sneak-peek!  It is in the country on half an acre but still close to town and church and it is actually 4 minutes closer to my husband's work.  It backs up to trees and there are tons of birds everywhere!  I saw a lot of Stellar blue jays and took a pic of one on the fence.  We had a deer run across the road when we were driving there last week - that is something I'm not used to watching out for!  It reminds me so much of home and since I can't live near home - this will hopefully give me some comfort and make me feel like I'm near in some ways.





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Monday, May 23, 2016

Changing Habits & Back to Homemade

It has been a while since I did a grocery budget but with us moving forward and hopefully closing on our first home next month, we will need to keep to a grocery budget.  No more just buying and not thinking about it like we have been.  My health has improved dramatically since we started eating a ton of fruits/veggies and I don't want to cut back on those - so I must go back to cooking more and buying less boxed stuff - which was merely for convenience.  We have buying mostly organic and we plan on still doing the same but not eating meat every night, which we used to only eat it on the weekends, as some of you may remember in past posts.  However, we have been having meat every night for a long time - it ain't cheap!  We only eat boneless/skinless chicken breasts, grass-fed beef, fish and turkey - but it seems to take more meat lately to last for all 4 of us.  So, going down to 3 days a week of meat will cut the budget down.

I'm setting our grocery food budget at $350 - which may seem high compared to what I used to blog about spending ($150-$250).  However, I told you we buy a lot of organic and we eat a ton of fruit/veggies now - so those really drive up the cost and they are important for us.  In the new house, we have loads of blackberry bushes and then I plan on planting raspberry and blueberry in the fall.  We also plan on doing several raised bed gardens next spring and growing our own lettuce, spinach, carrots, onions, snap peas, etc. like we used to but we will have half an acre - so I want to grow more than we need and hopefully learn to can too.  Until then, I will have to budget for them.

In preparation for all this, I've cleaned out my pantry and done inventories of all that we have on hand.  I'm going to try and use up a lot of things before we move and then do a large Azure order when we are in our new home to stock up for the year.  I went shopping at a few different stores today to get a feel for prices and I plan on making a full price book so that when I do my shopping twice a month, I will get the best deals.  Our new home is out in the country (which I love!!) but it also means I have to plan on our grocery trips because the stores we frequent now will be 25-30 minutes away instead of 5-10 minutes away.  All this makes it that much more important to meal plan and know the prices - good thing is the stores I shop are within a mile of each other - so I don't have to drive all over the place.  One store is on the way home from church, so I will be planning our stops there on the way home.  Instead of going weekly to the other stores, I plan on only going twice a month - this will offset any extra cost in gas hopefully for shopping trips.

My son, who is 3 1/2 now, eats a ton of food!  I'm so amazed at how much he eats.  He eats lots of fruit and veggies everyday (carrots, broccoli, blueberries/strawberries, banana, apple, mandarin oranges - you get the idea!), a yogurt almost daily, a granola bar everyday, tortilla chips, pretzels, graham crackers, pbj sandwich, tuna sandwich or burrito for lunch, string cheese, etc.  This kid has cost us a lot in food lately!   But I love him and I know as he grows, he will just eat even more, so I have got to get back to making things homemade and planning our dinner meals better and eliminating eating out. 

My plans are to start making homemade again for bread, rolls, muffins, pizza crust and sauce, granola bars, snacks, desserts, etc.  I've been out of it for a while and I made some granola bars and cookies this weekend and plan on making bread either tomorrow or Wed. and some muffins and then pizza on Friday.  A lot of our money goes toward the boxed stuff and bread - so making these homemade again will save a lot.

I'm trying out new recipes because I no longer use what we used to make because there was a lot of tomato-based meals and I cut out tomatoes due to my bladder issue, though it is doing better, I learned that tomatoes also cause inflammation and they really burn now whenever I have something with tomato sauce.  I still have something with tomato sauce or tomatoes in it but not like we used to eat!  Tomato-based meals are cheap but they destroy the lining of your esophagus, stomach, intestines and bladder over time and especially if you are eating it everyday.

I hope to blog about the process as I go but not sure what time will be like as we are packing and then moving and then setting up our new home in the next month.  If you have any tips for us or recipes that are CHEAP and good, leave a comment or drop me an email!

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Sunday, May 15, 2016

Some Exciting News!!

We prayed and sought counsel as well on this issue and my husband felt God opening the door and giving the ok and so we put an offer in and got our first house!  We still have the inspection and all that and it isn't "official" until closing but things are looking great and we don't foresee anything major coming up, Lord willing.  You guys - it is my DREAM home!  I honestly didn't think I would get my dream home because prices are high, our budget couldn't handle much and well - my dream was really back home in the South.  However, we came across this beautiful home in the country on half an acre and it was my favorite color on the outside and the layout inside was exactly what I wanted!  It had the privacy I craved and even a covered porch I could sit outside on, even in the rain.  I felt like I was back home in TN - it had a cabin feel on the inside and backs up to the trees.  I left it up to my husband and God to make the decision and was willing to keep renting and living in this mobile home another 10 years - but God led my husband differently.

I started thinking about Dave Ramsey and his advice he had given about saving more and have a down payment and only doing a 15-year loan (which would have been $100K we would need to save).  It would have taken us years and then our daughter would have been gone by then.  Our quality of life is important to us right now and I don't agree with his advice.  I take God into account - He is the great provider and we can depend on Him MORE than we can depend on our own means to obtain money.  I don't agree with my husband working 2 jobs and me working, just so we can have retirement, etc.  Family is MORE important than money!

I also don't view a mortgage as normal debt because even if you rent, you are paying a large sum of money and you HAVE to pay it each month or you won't have a place to live!  When you pay that amount towards your own home, you will have something you own at the end of 15-30 years and then you won't HAVE to pay anyone to live there, unlike renting.  16 years was just too long to pay someone else's mortgage!  We hope to pay this home off in 15-20 by making extra payments but if it takes us 30, we will still have something at the end when we enter retirement age.  We plan on living there forever as that is what my family back home does - they have all pretty much lived in the same house they bought 40+ years ago.  That is just what we are used to - we aren't used to this buy something and sell in 5 years that most people do - if we were, I could totally see the loss in having a mortgage, you would never own anything unless you made a killing in selling it!

With our new budget, we are nixing eating out for the most part and then going back to homemade just about everything.  I haven't done this in a LONG time because of my health but I'm doing good now and started cooking again more.  I plan to do a super-frugal month until we close on the loan, to help bulk our savings even more.  If I have time, I want to blog about all this!  Long-time readers may remember our super-frugal days and I'm excited for the challenge!  Not only will it help us have more money to save and have for home maintenance, it will help our health!!

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Thursday, May 5, 2016

Video - Me on Dave Ramsey - Renting or Buying?

We have been pursuing buying a home because we have rented for 16 years and have grown out of our space with the homeschooling materials.  Rent in our area for a 3 bedroom with a yard is about $1500 right now but our rent is VERY cheap in our mobile and as one local financial guy said it is impossible we have such low rent.  Yes, it seems so but we do and we know it won't last forever as our owners are nearing their 90's and who knows if they will sell the mobile park and our rent would go up.  A mortgage in our area for a decent 3 bedroom with a yard, including property taxes, homeowner's insurance and HOA's is around $1350-$1550 at the current low interest rate we would get.  So, it makes sense to buy as it is currently cheaper to buy than rent but I know Dave Ramsey is dead-set on having a down payment and only getting a 15-year mortgage - that is basically impossible in our area unless you save over $100K to get a home that low for a 15-year.  We are approved for VA, with no down payment and we don't have to pay PMI and our interest rate is very low - so it seems like an door of opportunity for us but we have put offers on 4 homes and they all didn't work out, so we are re-evaluating our next move.  We just want to do what is right and not a mistake - we have seen so many make the mistake and be deep in debt and chained all for just "owning" a home. 

So, I decided to call - although, I didn't get to go into detail like I wanted, I also didn't get to tell him we have a funded HSA for medical and that is part of our emergency fund but I didn't include it.  According to his advice, we should rent until we can save $100K - I'm thinking that is going to be many years down the road and doesn't count that we will need a car, daughter needs braces, she will be getting married probably in another 6 years or so, etc.  I don't see us ever saving that much cash but maybe we could.  Right now, since the medical drama is mostly over - we can save a TON of money - so maybe we should.  I'm not a person that needs to buy a house - I can make do with what I have - you guys know that!  I like living modestly and only need 1500sq ft or less just to have room to move around - not asking for a palace here LOL! ;-)  However, we don't have a garage and I'm thinking that would help if we did with storing homeschool materials since I'm saving it all for my son when he starts in 2 years.  I could just buy another bookcase and start putting things under beds, etc. and live cluttered for a while haha - I guess that is better than getting in over our heads.

Here is my call today:



What do you all think?  I would love to hear more opinions on this.

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Tuesday, May 3, 2016

You Dress Like a Man

How timely for such a news story to illustrate my last post on cross-dressing.  This woman, who is clearly cross-dressing, was upset that a man followed her into the bathroom because he thought she was a man and he was concerned about his mother, who was using the restroom.  He did the right thing!  Although, they made him look like a criminal but he wasn't!  If you don't want to be mistaken for a man, it is time to stop looking like one.

The closing remark at the end of the video, pretty much sums up some of the "Christian" world today and how skewed their minds are that are of the world and not of God:

You can't make assumptions by a person's gender, just by the way they look.


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Sunday, May 1, 2016

Cross-Dressing "Christians" Promote Transgenderism

I don't know what all the hoopla is about when a man says he is a woman and puts on a dress and long hair and then a "Christian" woman in her pants and short hair say that is not normal.  I hate to be the one to fill you in honey but you are cross dressing too!  At least the transgender man/woman knows how a woman should dress.  A transgender woman that says she is a man - wears pants and cuts her hair short.  They aren't confused on the proper look of the sexes but some "Christians" have been for quite some time.

I'm so glad that things are getting this way because it will show us how cross-dressing is wrong and always has been.  Have you seen a gender neutral bathroom sign?  It still has a man in pants and a woman in a skirt - there is a still a difference.  You can't judge transgender people when you yourself are dressing like the opposite gender.  No wonder the world thinks we are a bunch of hypocrites!  God's abominations haven't changed - cross-dressing is STILL abominable to our Creator!

Deut. 22:5
The woman shall not wear that which pertaineth unto a man, neither shall a man put on a woman's garment: for all that do so are abomination unto the Lord thy God.

The Geneva Bible's notes on this verse:

For that alters the order of nature, and shows that you despise God.

Matthew Henry's thoughts:

If we would prove ourselves to be God's people, we must have respect to his will and to his glory, and not to the vain fashions of the world. Even in putting on our garments, as in eating or in drinking, all must be done with a serious regard to preserve our own and others' purity in heart and actions. Our eye should be single, our heart simple, and our behaviour all of a piece.

Some so-called Christians have brought shame and reproach to the gospel by allowing the world to come in to all facets of their churches.  Proclaiming Christ while looking, acting, thinking, talking and being like the world - you aren't fooling anyone, I know Satan isn't fooled.  The Bible has told us in many areas to NOT BE DECEIVED - there will be those that will tell you everything is ok.  There will be those that say dress doesn't matter.  There will be those that say you don't have to follow the Bible - once saved, always saved, no matter if you sleep with everyone in town, show your body, lie, cheat, steal and skip church altogether.  Wow, sounds like a religion made by the devil himself as it goes against God's Word.  God clearly said such and such would not inherit the Kingdom of God - yet Billy Bob Joe down the street will tell you as long as you prayed that prayer, it don't matter if you wear daisy dukes and paint your face, your ready to go.  Are you really THAT stupid!?  I guess when you want to sin bad enough, you will believe anything and find any church to tell you exactly what you want to hear.

What is the first thing that a lot of women who leave the truth do?  They put on those pants and cut their hair and paint their faces.  It is to make them more like Christ right?  Or is rather to make them more like the world?  I think you know which one.  It serves no purpose in God - it is all carnal, fleshly and serves vanity and pride and selfishness.  Then, you get people patting them on back for sharing their new, sinful, worldly selves on Facebook - you know why?  Because they want it too and they rejoice in others being licentious.

It is time to look like a woman ladies - give the men their pants and hair back and wear the glory (long hair) that nature itself (of course God) has already taught us is right.  It is time to self-identify as a real woman.  Otherwise, maybe you should be using the men's restroom, p.s. it's the sign with the pants on.

After I wrote this post, a news story came up the following day about this very topic.  Watch the video here: http://www.christianhomekeeping.com/2016/05/you-dress-like-man.html

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Monday, April 18, 2016

Updates On My Crazy Life!

The past month has been astonishing.  I woke up one morning thinking I was dying, that this was really the end - I couldn't move my head and had the worst pain ever in the back of my head.  Long story short - they thought meningitis as I had been very sick but turns out it was just a very bad neck sprain from coughing all night in my sleep.  I still am dealing with it off and on but it is healing!

Then, got a call my dad was dying - they believed he had several blockages and his EKG was horrible and he would have had a heart attack had he not come in that day.  So, I tried to get tickets to fly down but it was going to be expensive and I just couldn't get peace about it.  When they went in to operate, they were amazed - I think God healed him! - he only had one small artery that was blocked and they cleared that and they chalked the heart issues up to stress.

Then on Friday, Nate finally made the decision I've pretty much been waiting on for 10 years - what we are going to do next in our life.  He decided we are going to stay in Washington and buy a house!  I was sad because I had set my heart on Cincinnati and being near my family but I was just relieved that he finally made a decision.  We actually already found a house on Saturday and put an offer in on Sunday and we will find out later tonight if we got the home.  (Update - didn't get the home, seller wanted $16K over asking, talk about crazy!).

So things were looking up and I felt a lot of peace about it all.  Then, I got a phone call at 10 p.m. last night and I knew it had to be bad as it was my dad.  My grandma died.  Seriously - I'm thinking God must have been asleep or just forgot that I'm not this strong and I can't handle all this right now LOL!

That is just a short update on my month so far - I can say that I've been through a lot spiritually too but thank God for a good Pastor that loves us!

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Friday, April 8, 2016

Garden: Tulips

The tulips started blooming the week after Easter Sunday and they are so beautiful to look at, I wonder why I've never had any before!  I love the yellow ones as yellow is my favorite color and there is an even an orange one.  I also noticed today one that was yellow and red, so pretty!  They aren't even all bloomed yet.  I love how they make me smile in the morning when I open the curtains - the beauty of God's creation can take your breath away!







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Sunday, March 27, 2016

Star String Lights on Bed Headboard

My friend had some cute star string lights draped across her headboard on her bed and I was in love and set out to find some to match my decor.  I found these beautiful metal silver stars with a brown cord at Bed Bath & Beyond for $12 and I love it!!



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Saturday, March 26, 2016

What I've Been Up To

I've been cooking a lot of recipes from one of my anti-inflammatory diet cookbooks and here is a recent one the whole family loved:


I spent a week doing a deep decluttering of our bedroom, and ended up with bags full of things to give away!  The only thing I didn't go through was under my bed because I got hit with either the flu or a really bad cold.


When my parents came to stay with us for 5 weeks in September, my dad cleaned out my old garden beds (I no longer garden) and planted tulip bulbs.  In one bed he did rows and the other he planted them in a shape of a cross.  What is so amazing is that they are growing big and looks like they may even open their blooms on Easter - how cool would that be?  I guess we will check them tomorrow and see.  I weeded the garden bed with the cross tulips but haven't weeded the other one.


Other than that I'm spending my time keeping house, raising kids, homeschooling and working on my health.  I would like to share videos of new ways I've learned to cook, natural medicine that I have delved deeply into and experienced amazing results and even all about how physical therapy is what most people need more than exercise.  Lots I would like to share but a lot of more needful things that I must do may not allow for much time - we will see how the next few months go.

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Friday, March 18, 2016

Holiness - Separates and Unites

I was reading over some things by A. Philip Brown II and this was so amazing I had to share.  I don't know who this man is, nor therefore do I agree with everything he writes, but he has some good stuff and this was most especially good.

Holiness is both a negative and positive principle in relation to the Body of Christ. There is no true unity, biblical unity, that does not have truth as its center and holiness at its gates. Holiness separates and it unites.

Separation
I. From the World
II. From False Teachers and Factitious Men
III. From Disobedient Brethren


Is it not interesting that what those who emphasize unity decry the most–separation– is the very means by which Scripture says unity is to be preserved?

Notice his last statement about separation - those who put a big deal on uniting are the same ones who cry out against those that separate - they are actually crying out against unity!  Who wouldn't want to separate?  Those that want to remain of the world, under false teachers or those with itching ears (tell me like I want to hear it preacher) and those who willfully are disobedient against God in separating from disobedient brethren and thereby are disobedient themselves.  They will mock those that separate as the Bible instructs, yet they are mocking God and despising those that are good.

He states the purpose of separation is purity of the gospel, preservation of unity and protection of saints, preservation of unity among the brethren, protecting the purity of the Body of Christ and that the disobedient brethren may be ashamed and repentant of his sin and return.

So if we don't separate as God instructs from these things (world, false teachers, disobedient brethren) - we are therefore, in essence, destroying the purity of the gospel and the Body of Christ and the unity and protection of the saints and ultimately are partakers in the disobedient brethren's demise for eternity because we deny him the shame, for which his sin should bear to draw him to repentance!  You can become the very reason someone doesn't return to God because you don't let them feel the sting of shame for their sin.

This is why those that don't want holiness do all 3 of the things that holiness requires separation from!  They UNITE with the world.  They UNITE with the false teachers.  They UNITE with the disobedient brethren.  They do the opposite of what true holiness does and thereby, they reveal they are not of God.  So think about that the next time someone you know gets a stink about separation - they are looking to unite back with what they were once separate from!  It won't be long they will show their true desires, which is to be unholy.

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Friday, February 5, 2016

The Degradation of Men - Still a Woman's Revolution

Our society began the degradation of men in the name of women's rights.  Under the guise of liberating the woman and being "free" to have a career, they skillfully made men obsolete and only to be used to help the woman gain whatever it was she wanted.  Now, we are left with a culture that came from these Godless women.  A culture that hates children.  A culture that thinks it is a WOMAN'S right to kill her baby and thus, a culture that says murder is a right - but only for women, because if the other half of the baby's DNA wanted to kill the baby, that would go against a woman's right.  We currently have a woman of this mindset running to be President, she is on a mission to have that final stomping ground over her husband, she must conquer him at all costs and she will be, basically already is, the virago queen of feminists everywhere.  However, she will never be satisfied, though she trample over man and reaches the top, because she was made to be what God intended and seeking after the opposite is a endless endeavor.

Is it is any wonder that we have a society full of fornication, adultery, pedophilia, gender-confusion, homosexuality and all other manner of perversions?  No, it was and still is something that originated from a woman.  Men have become the laughingstock of the entertainment of our society.  They are constantly ridiculed, made a spectacle of and demeaned to be lower then women.  Are men ok with this?  They seem to be because I don't see a men's rights movement coming in the future.  They are deadly silenced by the mighty woman.

What will it take to bring the respect back to men?  It will take women returning to ladies for men to return to gentlemen.  The power is still in the hand of the woman because men have proven to be weak by allowing women to rise to where they are now.  I'm not saying women should be beneath men - although these women seem to think it is ok for men to be there - but I'm saying they should be who God made them to be; man's help meet.

I have to be careful that in my own marriage and dealings with other men that I don't allow the degradation-mentality to infiltrate my thoughts and words.  It is difficult to grow up in a society that drills it into you in every aspect of your life from public schooling to music and movies.  I've had to eradicate a lot of junk that was fed into me that I didn't even realize the spirit behind it as a growing child and then a woman.  Putting God's Word into our minds and constantly renewing our minds through it is a big factor in this purging process.  However, not allowing certain messages through media to enter our thoughts is also important.  We are truly in the world but we are not to be of it.

The silent women that do follow God's Word and are the Biblical model of a woman, wife and mother need to arise and make their presence known if we are ever going to win back the minds of women.  So many older women are realizing they bought into the lie.  As they sit lonely, unmarried by choice and childless by choice, it is too late for them and there are no do-overs.  They are realizing that the corporate career is not so fulfilling as they once thought and won't be there holding their hand at death's door.  These are the women that are starting to voice their mistakes and warn the younger generation to not chase after careers by forsaking motherhood and the family.  It is time the world listens and it is time to start a new revolution, that of returning home.

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Monday, January 11, 2016

January Grocery Expenditures

I'm starting to try and cut down our grocery budget after over a year or so of not tracking what we spend.  We have easily spent upwards of $500 a month for food EEK!  That is what it costs if you don't make homemade things and I just can't bear to spend that much anymore and my health is allowing me to do more things in the kitchen now thankfully.

We needed to stock up on some meat this month and I came across my buy price for chicken breast, which is $1.99 a pound and so glad I did because we needed some.  The ground beef we buy is always expensive as we only buy organic grass fed beef, so we try and only use 1 pound per week.  We have been eating fish for the past 4 months or so and enjoying it, so we now eat fish 1-2 times a week.  What I need to add in more of is our meatless meals that have been sorely lacking because of the time required to cook the beans, etc.  I do plan on making more this month.

I spent $248 in our first grocery shopping trip for this monthly cycle and almost $100 of that was stocking up.  I'm trying to only spend $100 for the rest of the month, which would put us at $350 a month for food.  I eventually want to get it down to $250 but it will take a lot of work and planning.  One reason is because most of the meals I used to make when we ate very frugal were tomato-based recipes and I can't do tomatoes anymore, or at least not that much!  They are very irritating to the bladder and they promote inflammation in the body, along with white potatoes, green/red peppers and eggplant.  I've noticed that eliminating these inflammatory vegetables helps my pain.  I've switched to eating sweet potatoes when the rest of the family eats white potatoes and it is working.  Every now and then I crave potato chips and have some but I usually pay for it.

Here is a list of what I've bought for this month for $248.  I have $100 for milk, bread and produce for the rest of the month.

Meat - $88.40
17 lbs. chicken breast - $33.79
4 lbs. (16) chicken breast burgers - $12.12
Chicken breast nuggets - $10.54
2 lbs. organic grass-fed ground beef - $11.96
2 lbs. Wild Alaskan salmon - $10
2 lbs. Wild Alaskan cod - $9.99

Dairy & Eggs - $42.83
1 gal. Organic whole milk - $5.69
1 gal. Organic 2% milk - $5.69
Vanilla Caramel creamer - $3
2 lbs. Tillamook cheddar cheese - $6.99
16 oz. cottage cheese - $2.16
24-ct string cheese - $3.96
16 Laughing Cow cheese wedges - $3.96
11 Yoplait yogurts - $5.39

Produce - $41.87
4 lbs. bananas - $2.91
Organic Fuji apples - $3.32
30 oz. blueberries - $4.99
2 lbs. organic baby carrots - $2.99
10 oz. organic chopped kale - $2.99
1 lb. organic salad mix - $5
3 organic romaine hearts - $3
Organic ginger root - $2.99
5 lbs. white potatoes - $0.98
2 lbs. yams - $1.42
3 small avocados - $2.34
3 lbs. organic green beans (frozen) - $4.98
95 oz. applesauce, unsweetened - $3.96

Frozen - $14.04
Frozen pizza - $3.99
Burritos - $2.95
5 lbs. crinkle- cut fries - $4.48
Ice cream - $2.62

Other - $60.85
Chips - $2.82
22 oz. organic tortilla chips - $5.96
15 oz. pretzels - $1.81
18 oz. Cheerios - $2.48
24 granola bars - $5
1 lb. lasagna noodles - $1.79
4 boxes organic mac/cheese - $5
2 packages of seaweed - $3.34
5 oz. croutons - $1.99
1 lb. organic tofu - $1.99
1 qt. Oat milk - $2.37
Half gallon Soymilk - $3.28
Organic salad dressing - $2.69
2 ketchups no HFCS - $3.92
48 oz. pickles - $3.98
1 lb. peanuts - $1.98
24 ct. flour tortillas - $2.98
3 loaves bread - $7.47

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Saturday, December 26, 2015

2016 - Time to Rebuild!

I was looking back at my word for last year and it was "Adapt" because I was pregnant and expecting a new baby in 2015.  Not only did I lose that baby but 2015 was the most painful, debilitating year of my life.  I still can't tell of all I went through because my body actually relives it as I even THINK on it, I start feeling the pain as if I'm there again.  I felt as though I was broken in pieces and hit the bottom and then the bottom fell out!  I felt ground to powder - I felt forsaken by God but I know that is not true but in the midst of it, I wasn't so sure.

I began to think on what my word for 2016 would be.  I knew it was going to do something with recovery as I'm still recovering and it is a long road.  I prayed and the word came - REBUILD!  I started shouting actually because I felt the Holy Spirit so strong - this is the year that not only I, but our family, rebuilds all that has been broken down!  We are so broken on so many levels that the only thing to do is either die, spiritually speaking, or rebuild what Satan and hardship have destroyed.

I'm rebuilding my body, mind and soul!  I'm going to strive to rebuild the structure of our home, my children and I believe my husband is also on board to rebuild in his own life.  This year was a test - would we still continue for God despite the infirmities, despite the losses, despite the friends that walked away...?  Satan - I WILL continue!  

I get Paul now - I glory in my infirmities!  I'm thankful that God allowed what I went through this year.  It made me a better person and it made me stronger.  It showed me things that I needed to let God burn off in my life.  Truly when we are weak, we are strong if we let God have His perfect way.  I pray that God will help me as I endeavor to make this year one of rebuilding.

My theme song for the year is one called, Building Up the Wall, and it is best sung by the Ambassador Youth Choir, but I couldn't find it online, so provided the words:

Building up the Wall
By Jim E. Davis
© 1992 HIM Music

Chorus:

I’m building up the wall, and I won’t come down
I’m building up the wall, and I won’t come down
I’m building up the wall, and I won’t come do - own
Building up the wall and I won’t come down

Verse I:

The walls of Jerusalem were broken down to the ground in shame
But Nehemiah had a heart to rebuild them up again
And when the enemy came to mock, Nehemiah stood his grou - nd
He said, "I'm building up this wall, and I won't come down"

Verse II:

The devil he dropped by today, just to have a little chat with me
He said “Son, you’re workin’ way too hard! Come on down and rest your feet!”
Well I didn’t even stop to take the time to turn arou - nd
Because I’m building up the wall and I won’t come down

Verse III:

The world is lookin’ on; they just shake their heads and say
“That wall’s way to high! You don’t have to live that way!”
My answer is still the same, and it will never, ever cha - ange,
Because I’m building up the wall and I won’t come down


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A Look Back on 2015


The year of pain, desperation, hitting rock bottom... that was 2015.  But it was the also the year that I grew closer to God, trusted Him like never before, had to allow others to help me and realized how judgmental I had been in so many ways.  Ouch!  What a painful, yet needed experience this past year was!  It was the year I started getting back the "old Bev" - not the sinful one but the one that was strong and able to stand up for herself and say NO when needed.  Not sure how I lost her but she is back.

Sure, this past year was full of losses - my baby and my uterus - but it was also a year of miracles.  As a wise older woman told my husband; it was the year your wife didn't die!  Yes - instead of saying this was the year that I lost my baby, that I lost my uterus, that I developed numerous health issues and believed I was dying........It was the year I did NOT die, though Heaven would have been nice a bit early but my husband is thankful it wasn't my time!

I'm still having so many health problems but I still believe that God knows all about it and He ALLOWED these things to happen for my good.  Above all, I must make it to Heaven.  Above all, my family must make it to Heaven.  So many friends have quit - they stopped!  They went back to the world, they resurrected their dead, sinful self and sadly, they are dying and going to hell but I chose not to be one of them!  It's still You and me Jesus!!

I thought I was done with this blog and closed it down earlier this year but decided to reopen it and see what happens.

Here are my most memorable posts of 2015:


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